Oh TOL, it took some real courage to put all those thoughts and feelings into your blog. Of course, I would never judge you; your story is one that is so familiar. You are just describing the spiral that all of us in debt have encountered, the downward spiral, that when you hit the bottom, it's time to get things sorted once and for all. Just think, you are now climbing back up the staircase again and when you reach the top, you will have completed your IVA and will have come so far in your journey.
Do you know what I mean by the charity domes that you see in shops, that when you drop a penny in, it whirls round and round until finally it drops through the hole at the bottom? Well that's how I think of my journey, I spiralled downwards and when I dropped into that hole, it was very black and lonely. I am now climbing the ladder to get back out of that hole to see daylight again. Does that sound crazy?
I have loved reading you blogs, they are so honest and you speak from the heart. Well done for achieving what you have so far on your journey, you're a real inspiration to all on the forum. Good luck hun. Kazzy x