Will this feeling go away....?

[dipsy]

Thanks Tina... The ups and downs of IVA land I think!!!

[Tina Shortland]

Absolutely but we're all here to help you through it!

[Bailo]

Thank you so so much guys; What an amazing group of people you are! Although I have shed a tear reading some of your replies, I feel like a you have given me a huge supportive hug through this thread....amazing! Tina;. could totally feel the love and support. The great thing is that reading some of the replies, I know that I do have friends (even though we dont know each other) totally on my waive length!!! And that means alot because I do not have to explain too much or feel that I am possibly being judged! Lem, Missp & Oscar; thank you especially as I know now my feelings are normal. And Dipsy....we can do this journey! Fingers Crossed. Wise words Tina on the worry front; I wish i was different but you are right I need to channel those thoughts into positive energy for a positive outcome next week. Thank you xx

[Niobe]

You will get there and always have the support of the forum.

Who knows? You may get to meet some of us one day as we do meet up a couple of times a year.

We have some very good friends on and off forum.

[missyp]

Good look Bailo with your creditors meeting on the 6th. I am sure you will sigh with relief when it is all accepted. I know I did, in fact I couldn't stop crying because the relief was overwhelming.

Remember, if in the future you have any difficulties or your circumstances change you must contact your IP straight away rather than let it worry you. That is what they are there for, to give you expert advice to help you and point you in the right direction.

We are all friends on this site, we are all going through the same experiences, each of us has different circumstances but the outcome is the same - to be debt free.

Please keep us posted with your progress.

xxx

[lem]

I remember crying when ours was approved with relief more than anything, and then feeling somewhat subdued for a while that it had come to this, but you just have to learn from the past and look forward to the future.

[oscar]

Hope you are feeling better today Bailo, hang in there
Oscar
x

[Shining]

We're all doing our best each and every one of us within an IVA.

Hope your days get more positive the closer you come to acceptance. x

[Loads a Debt]

Hi Bailo,

I'm sure your post will help many others who are in the same boat, well put indeed.

As you have read, the majority of us have been in your situation. I've just made my 3rd payment and have to say that things are starting to feel much better; I’ve even just started to sleep better than in the last 3 years. At first, when my IVA was being put together, I felt like a fraud not paying all my debt back. But since it was approved and I found this website, I have begun to understand that this situation is not entirely my own fault. I'd go back 12 years after my divorce to the pivotal moment, being given a mortgage based on 4.5 times my salary and not even having my disposable income considered. In those 12 years I continually struggled to make ends meet and have some sort of life with my children. In the end I was constantly moving debt and juggling pay day loans, so as to not miss a payment and incur the nice charges our lenders are so quick to slap on our accounts.

I felt all those things too, although being divorced and single, I don't have to deal with the relationship side of the problems you have. But, has many have said, you'll need to communicate and hopefully that will improve your relationship.

I only told my boss about my situation and he has been really sympathetic. He's given me some additional hours to take me up to the 10% threshold and allowed me to use my company credit card in emergencies and have it deducted from my salary. Have cool is that!

If I were you I'd tell your closet friend. If she is a friend she will understand and make allowances. Hey, if it wasn't for people like us the current economic model would have collapsed before 2007 and they would probably be in a similar situation to you. (I'll get off my soap box now ).

I'm sure your proposal will be accepted as reading many threads on this site, they usually do; give a little tweak here and there.

A few tips from me, don't bother answering any calls and file any debtor’s correspondence from now on. I disconnected my landline for a month and now only get the usual sales or Nigerian lottery win calls.

Best wishes Daz

[Niobe]

Have to say Loads a debt that we've never had a lottery scam call!!

My kids and our daughter know of the situation family wise. The wifes work have found out but don't have a problem with it, she certainly wouldn't tell any of her colleagues though.

I'm retired so just rely on pension and the wifes salary to get by.

Debtors correspondence you can either shred or send to your IP for them to deal with. We never answered any calls pre iva, not worth the hassle.

Hope you are feeling more positive at the moment.

[dipsy]

Hi Bailo
Hope you are feeling better today. I know I am!!! The IVA journey certainly is a roller coaster of emotions.. up one minute down the next. We are bound to get good and bad days but we are lucky to have the support of all our forum friends. Good luck to you and as I say... we are in this together!!!

[craigiewicked1]

What you have written is what we were feeling 2 and a half years ago, now we are able to budget, plan, talk and look ahead. the only payment we have to make is the iva and no calls or letter come here (i even like junk mail now as its not a collection letter lol). it will be fine and you can be confident that the future will be all good. one point regarding arguing with your partner, its really not worth it as at the end of the day its only money and will not matter in a hundred years.

[Niobe]

Hope you are feeling ok today Bailo - we're all here for you for support and advice.

[Broke of London]

Not long now until your meeting! Enjoy the rest of the long weekend x

[lilaclady2k]

I must admit like the others I used to dread the bills coming through the door and how was I going to pay them. But since being in an IVA I no longer receive the phone calls or the threatening letters and yes I/we can sleep at night.

No one knows about our IVA and I must admit DFD did consider my work place. Hence the company I work for could have frowned up on me being bankrupt which could have meant I lost my job.

I have only just found this site and it’s nice to know there are people out there you can talk too.

Best wishes from me too for your meeting on Wednesday.