Thank you all again for your comments - they have given me ideas and yes Rosepetal I think the way to go is to set up a pin on my answerphone so messages won't play without it.
It's true to say I am at my lowest and I know I keep repeating myself but without this forum I just don't know where I would be. It seems that everyone else around seems to be without financial problems but of course I know this is not true - behind closed doors tells another story Im sure. Tomorrow is monday and I will make some further calls. I have my expenditure ready but I have a door collection tomorrow of £80 which I just don't have. I don't want to not open the door because my 2 children will wonder what the hell is going on but I can't face saying to the loan collector I can't pay - it is a provident homeloan that is collected weekly by cash. I am so scared that I feel I will have to scrape something together and use the little I have for food and petol just to avoid a confrontation at the door. Any advice would be most appreciated... the safety of a Sunday evening will soon be over.
I am sorry that you feel that we have not adhered to your instructions, and if you can e-mail me direct this is something I will need to look into.
I am happy to discuss this with you directly if you can send me a private e-mail. My staff do not operate a policy of client harassment, and I would have to say that I do feel this relates to a misunderstanding rather than anything else - but nevertheless it must be fully investigated.
hi, i understand exactly how you feel. when our 2 children were younger i'd had time out of work following heart surgery. we had a debt collecter calling with his book for £ to the door. i'd be sick with fear that 1 of them would open the door while i was out of ear shot&let him in. i'd keep bobbing back thinking i'd heard the door when i hadn't[:(],it was terribly stressful. i felt so ashamed that my neighbours would realise we had debt problems.
however pressed you feel do not give away money you need for food. i've been there,hiding,pretending to be out,it is horrible. to live the way you are dreading Sunday evening is no way to be,it doesn't have to be this way. 18months of reading is a long time....time to act now sweetie,hug.
our debt situation came to light to me in October last year,it was a dreadful shock. i remember it being Christmas time,hubby&i sat in a big shopping place,watching all those people mulling around carrying bags& bags of stuff. that christmas was one of our most simple BUT,the sheer bliss of no credit card bills that choke you was the best feeling.
you can tell your children you are going to open a new bank account to pay these bills. get yourself a new bank account,we went with co op,who have been IVA friendly. many people who post have taught children about budgeting from this experience.
have you looked at the link to check out several IP firms? we spoke to more than one before settling on Mel's team.
i'm sure other's who've posted will check in to see how you are today.
You Are NOT alone. make yourself a list of things to do ie pin for the phone,IP firms to speak to,basic bank account.
big hug[;)] x
Nothing stays the same...everything changes..hang on in there!
Thank you so much! I've read so many of your other posts - it seems to me you are an inspiration. Today doomed and I gave over 40 of the 80 I owed. Now I have to ask for early payment of my wages - humilation, embarrassemt and the rest God only knows - but you helped me and I thank you.
Melanie -thank you too. Your message it is so formal. I wish I had never posted my niggle on here. Harrassment is a bit harsh and a term that you use not me. Misunderstanding, no not at all since I received confirmation of my email request, a subsequent apologie and another one several months later when a cold call was made and another subsequent apologie made. I wish now given my circumstances I wish I had never mentioned this and i have no intention of persuing this in such a stressful time> Your advisors made a mistake and I have documented proof of this - but please don't go down a road being padantic.
Today I managed sausages and waffles with my boys - I also maanaged a conversation with an IP - who cares about
Can you please let me have the date of the calls you are referring to. We record all incoming and outgoing calls, and I have to follow up the points you are making about my firm and staff on the internet, and as I only employ two advisors - and one of them has been on holiday for the last two weeks, so it will be very easy to track you down.
I am not being pedantic - merely wanting following up something that you chose to post in public. And as we absolutely never cold call anyone, I am concerned to fully investigate this matter that you have kindly brought to my attention.
I do agree that you speak off forum to Mel about this - she will want to sort it out and put things right if necessary.
As to your doorstep collections - I presume they will be round again next week, how are you going to manage to pay them then?
Speak to someone and start the ball rolling and use a phone number that only you have. If you don't live with your mum, do you have a phone at your current address or a mobile phone?
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
hi, i hope you are ok. glad to hear that you're taking steps to getting things sorted out for you & your children, things can't go on as they are.
be very careful getting a early sub on your wages,it's like getting into credit cards needed to buy food,a very slippery slope,take great care.
can you not confide a little in your mum? it's not good owing money,but maybe she'd help & you could re pay a few pounds a week?
i know how humiliating the door step collections are,it it your decision but i would urge you to now stop payments to all debtors, save every spare penny for your emergency fund. be honest with the man when he calls,if you've made a decision who to go with give him IP details.
get your new basic bank account sorted. things can only get better& now you're taking control they will,x
Nothing stays the same...everything changes..hang on in there!
If you are going to be making any payments to creditors whilst setting up an IVA then you have to make token payments to all of them, not just one. If you do that you are preferring one creditor over the rest. Best thing is not to pay at all and build up a bit of a contingency fund.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
Thank you all for your help and advice. I have started the ball rolling and although I was physically sick with the stress of it all on Tuesday I am now starting to sort through things.
Rosepetal I know what you mean about confiding in my mum but I just can't. She is a pensioner with her own troubles and although she has help me many times before I don't feel that it is fair to trouble her yet again. I am already in a DMP but there are other creditors that are not included in the DMP i.e the doorstep collector. I think probably the best thing would be to write a note to Provident and explain that I cannot make any payments at the moment as I may have to enter an IVA. Do you think this would be acceptable - this is the only creditor I am worried about at the moment because of the doorstep visit?
Once again thank you all for your advice and support.
It won't hurt to write to them. Glad you've got the ball rolling now.
Good luck.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
Im not sure if its me but I cannot find my last posts through the forum so clicked on your avatar for this commication.
Just to ask should I stop posting? I have obviously offended Melanie though it was not my intention. I have addressed this off forum after receiving a letter from their office but no response since... I really need this forum support but feel bad because I posted based on my experience. Please help - this forum keeps me going but I don't want to be judged because of my freedom of expression.
On another note I have taken positive action - and now on the way to an IVA application with the advice to build up a contingicy in the meantime. Still unslightly sure if I could do a dmp but worrying about my post instead... c'est la vie.
Whatever happens thank you for your non bias support.
You haven't offended Melanie at all tajsiva - she was concerned that there might have been a problem with her office and I am sure that now you have communicated it will be sorted out. It may be that they have been busy and haven't been able to get back to you yet.
Please don't stop posting, the forum is here for any advice and support you need.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
Not raining here either - it's very warm and humid though.
Sharing from experiences of dealing with debt
The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.
Bob Marley. http://kallis3.blogs.iva.co.uk
