CLOTHING EXPENDITURE ON A IVA

[OPTIMIST12]

Further to your earlier post R1chard I was thinking what I would feel if I was a person who was on a low wage but who managed to pay all their bills every month and who had not fallen for easy credit. I think to be honest I would NOT have a great deal of sympathy for people on IVAs/ or BR as I would question WHY were they being allowed to write off a lot of what they owe. And - to be honest - that would be a perfectly fair point of view.

Now I am in an IVA myself I completely accept that I am in for a tough five years and it should NOT be any other way. I got into debt and should br expected to pay the maximum possible back. After all if I had lent a friend £100 and he came back to me later and said "Sorry mate - I've also borrowed £100 from Tom, Dick, and Harry so I can only pay you back £25 each then I would NOT be impressed!!!

But - on the other hand - the option of an IVA was there for me and I have taken it. I am not proud of it and guess I will always feel guilty for getting into the position where I needed one. I know that creditors get some stick on the forum but you cant really blame them for doing everything to try and get back what they are owed. If my hypothetical spendthrift friend was real I would not just turn round and say "OK - thats alright - forget about the other £75!!!!!".

This whole business is just so complicated - every case so different - that there are always going to be a complete spectrum of views. I think I come from towards R1chards side of opinion - that is just my opinion.

I dont have kids though so am in no position to comment there and can understand it must be heartbreaking when kids suffer because of their parents financial problems.

Thats the end of my lecture for today!!!

[R1chard]

too true optimist..

i just want to point out i wasnt judging anyone, that would be the pot calling the kettle black,.

also i respect people who want the best fo thier kids, i cant name a (responable) parent who wouldnt, i was mearly giving a point of view.

at least one things true - we have all seen the light as regards debt and will strive to avoid it at all costs (barring mortage) in the future.

[Lisa2009]

OPTIMIST, i agree with you completely, we all are duty bound to pay back as much as we possibly can. afterall it is our mess. It is a shameful situation to be in and not one i would personally put myself in again.

Richard my earlier post was in no way a dig at what you were saying and i totally respect your opinions.

[Lisa2009]

Sorry if i got anybodys back up, its just hard when the kid eats more clothes than food.

[OPTIMIST12]

Hi skint -

I agree - "shameful" is a very true and accurate description. It is a natural feeling.

But whats done is done - the main thing now is to knuckle down and make those payments. I am already from time to time imagining again what it will be like to have my whole salary to myself (absolutely stupid I know with more than 4 years to go) - but you have to remain positive.

[Lisa2009]

Hopefully mine will be over soon if my F&F is accepted, ok i wont be that much better off but i will be slightly contented in the knowledge that i did my best and paid back as much as i could.
I have learned that if not used correctly, credit can be a very dangerous thing. I have also learned that i cant have what i cant afford and that, i hope has rubbed off in my children for future reference.

[Adam Davies]

Hi
Children are often under pressure to wear the named shoes and clothes etc and as a parent it,s hard to see them go without.School uniforms are another thing and this year two of mine had to have school track suits at £50 a time.
A reasonable clothing allowance is only fair where children or work dictate,saying that I was happy to buy clothes off bay for myself when in my IVA.
regards

Andy Davie
IVA.co.uk Spokesperson

About me:
http://www.iva.co.uk/andy_davie_profile.asp

IVA Helpline: 0800 197 4838
http://www.iva.co.uk/iva_helpline.asp

[lily]

Skint, I can identify with the chewing of jumpers thing, my sons were reduced to threads in just one day. We gave him a towel to chew on, cut up into four, it did help I pin it to him and I wash it everyday. Its a big problem to me also trying to keep up.

lily

[cynth]

Ho Lily

How old are your children, it must be difficult coping in a situation like that, pales our problems into insignificance.

Cynth

[lily]

No Cynth

I just have a different way of life and different values, I dont take anything for granted, I used to be materialistic and selfish before I became a mom. I think they have taught me so much. It has been hard, I would say a learning curve but its felt more like a hanging off a learning cliff with fingernail hairs but hey ho, I made it, well I am making it and so are they. They really try hard with everything they do, they choose a meal and have to help cook it each night, its fun, honest. The ways, the days you just cant imangine how funny and amazing it is. I feel really lucky to have been part of their lives.

This debt thing and this last year has been much worse for me, I wouldnt want to live through this again.

lily

[cynth]

Hey,

thats the spirit!, I have school age children, do yours go to main stream school?

Cynth

[lily]

My daughter goes to mainstream my boys special school. She is 'normal'. I have one at college, lives in special accomodation, supported by a careworker. He is a genius at maths but his disability holds him back in other areas of his life.

lily

[scaredkez]

hi everyone firstly i would like to thank everyone for their kind words in regards to my mother in law, i didn't mean to open a can of worms and lily in one of her posts put down exactly what i meant, i certainly didn't mean we shouldn't have any sort of life or want things we wouldn't be human if we didn't, that night made me think of so much more when my son poured his heart out on a piece of paper, there was nothing material in it, if you understand what i mean, anyhow i won't be on for a while, thanks again to all, i have had a rotten year, not wanting anyone to feel sorry for me, but this is one journey i certainly would never like to repeat.
good luck all.
kerri

Please view my blog at: http://scaredkez.blogs.iva.co.uk/