Stress and Health.

[kallis3]

Hi Elizabeth - is CRPD similar to COPD? My hubbie suffers from the latter.

So sorry to hear about all your problems - I think you are great for being as strong as you are with everything you have to deal with.

Enjoy your break and just chill and recharge those batteries.

I am sure Melanie will sort out your letter.

[elizabethr]

CRPD - Complex Regional Pain Disorder - symptoms very physical but comes from a malfunction of the brain where the messages go all wrong (basically get your wires crossed!). Philp under an excellent team at Liverpool - Walton Neurological Centre. Had Neurostimulator implant (bit like internal tens machine) but had to have it disconnected because body rejected and electrocuted him. Some wires still in and causing problems so having operation in the next few weeks. Other symptoms now happening though so has been referred back to original team of consultants that diagnosed. Its a bit like MS I think - he has uncontrollable pain, medication makes him like jekyll and hyde, wants to cut his arm off to make the pain go away. No got muscle wastage in his legs and fit type symptoms before he goes to sleep. Wants to keep on working but not sure how long. We will have income repacement after 3 months if he does go off but its all the other things like depression because he's useless and being tired all the time so I have to sort all the financial stuff myself as well as working full time.

[kallis3]

Elizabeth, that sounds awful! It's nothing like COPD which is to do with the lungs. I'd tried to look it up on the internet and it came back with some lung disorder, so I was barking up completely the wrong tree there!

I think you are marvellous for coping with everything.

I take it there is no cure? I really do feel sorry for you both. It sounds so bad that I just can't think of adequate words to say.

Sending lots of hugs to you both.

[elizabethr]

No cure. Not fatal apart from the risk of suicide through depression. Been not too bad for a couple of years but getting worse now. Just had hospital review this afternoon. Having wires taken out soon because stimulator didn't work and being referred back to main team about deterioration. Main problem is the condition becomes all encompassing and focus is on illness.

[freelili]

Elizabeth

With all that youre going through, I am begining to wonder if an IVA is the right solution for you. Its your choice at the end of the day and you have the best in the business putting it all together. However, will you cope with all this for the next five years? Would it be too much to declare Br and at least have some breathing space?

I know that you want to keep your house etc, but with a poorly hubby, suicidal relative, a twelve year old and working full time...... It all seems a bit much to me. In fact any one of these is enough to put many under the table. I care for three and I worked almost full time and I found it very hard. I wanted my IVA more than anything but now I dont think I would have coped if I had it... 5 years and an unknown journey with illness.....

I am sure that if you did go BR any OR would be very sympathetic, I was told they would be with me and I have half your problems. I care for my own children which is what mothers do, they dont feel guilty or bad or useless. ~Sometimes they get frustrated, I dont know how your hubby copes, knowing this is all on your shoulders, the poor thing.

Just something to think about, I know its your choice and you will do whats best for you. I cant know what its like........I just kind of wish you the best. I hope you will get some peace of mind soon and things begin to look up.

I think two people would find this hard, let alone one.

[elizabethr]

Don't want to lose the family home - I am already going through "what have I worked for all these years". I have lots of pets and wouldn;t be able to take them to rented. So bankruptcy not an option. The IVA once sorted wont be a burden for me it will be a relief - I won't have to deal with the creditors and as for more credit I don't want any. My husband is not much help - I love him dearly (we have divorced once and then remarried each other). We will get through it - I told him today that I was having counselling at work and he didn't understand wny!!! That says a lot.

[freelili]

Well I understand that, I totally wouldnt be without my pets. Anyway, I wish you the very best of luck and hope you get some much needed relief very soon.

[kallis3]

Elizabeth, I am the same - two dogs and I wouldn't be without them.

I think you are an amazing woman for coping with the problems you and your family have.

I am sure you will all come out of this ok.

Hugs to all of you

[Skippy]

I can understand that - I would never let anyone take Harry away from me. Pets are a great stress reliever - I'm off sick today and stayed in bed and Harry came and curled up on the bed with me and it probably sounds daft but it made me feel better knowing he was there.

Sorry, I'm rambling. I don't think men understand counselling, and to be honest it didn't help me when my dad died, but for those it does help it's a great thing.

What your husband is going through sounds awful. My dad had MS and although he couldn't walk or use his hands he still suffered pain in his arms and legs. If he could give up work it would take the pressure off both of you, maybe not immediately but in the long term. You will get through this as you obviously love each other very much.

Take care and enjoy your break x