Paperwork our end completed!

[Johndylan]

Me and my wife are both from west wales, not far from Tenby and close to the sea. Both having iva's proposed seperately, as the payments will be better to our creditors. Its all largely my fault, buried my head in the sand for years, thinking things would work out better, but the debt just got bigger. If i hadnt found this site, our debts would probably have hit 100k in around 2 years. Currently standing at around 78k, sounds unbelievable. Loads of factors have contributed, mainly both had very good salaries around 8 years ago, my wife was earning a lot more then, our property was valued at around 280k so didnt worry as long as there was equity we could sell and pay off the debts. The property is now only worth 185k and we owe 186k[:(]

[Niobe]

We live in Staffordshire, our IVA's are separate as some debts were joint and others just mine.

[wiggle1]

Hi johndylan, my husband and I are both from West Wales across the water from Tenby. Good luck on your journey, it's worth it in the end. We should be making our last payment this month if all goes according to plan.

[Spanna1310]

Its lovely to hear were a few of us are from, and nice to know that were not alone in this process..
A little bit about my/our story i was married in 2001 had my first son in 2001 and i had 2 more children with my husband at the time i was in the Navy, my husband was in the Navy too, I left and moved wherever he was based including cold Scotland for 18 months.. He left the Navy in 2004 and our relationship went down hill and then started the abuse, then the violence and then id kick him out then id have him back when he promised not to hurt me again and the cycle went on, then i found a diary entry/note from my 6 year old at the time saying that he was scared of his dad -I did get back with him after this for the last time as i was pregnant with our third child and he promised hed changed and it did whilst i was pregnant but then it went downhill fast again and then i kicked him out and that was the last time. i still get regular verbal abuse from him via text and phone calls and then letters from social services saying hes been in contact with them again - have been told if he does it again he will up for wasting time, little does he know that i got them to complete a report after we separated because i knew this is a route he would go down (it's just his style and way of doing things). I went through numerous counseling methods including the eating disorder service as i found out i was anorexic which is apparently because its the only thing i had control over whilst i was with him. The majority of my debt is because of him - his credit rating was shocking and he took credit out in my name and he told me that it was his right to take credit out in my name because we were married...
I'm now with my current partner and have been for 3.5 years we have a daughter together who is now 14 months old and we are really happy and he has debts from his previous relationship - so we decided that we need to sort these debts out once and for all, totaling nearly £85k (nothing to show for it either), plus we had bailiffs knocking at the door, we don't own a house etc how awful is that... we have 4 children and we feel that we going through an iva we can teach the children along the way a few valuable financial lessons so hopefully they wont get in the position we are in now.. there's always hope lol x

So that's a little bit about me and my situation just want to move forward from the past and look to the future for our family x Just hoping for the iva to be accepted before Christmas that would be a fab Christmas present for us x

Sorry for the long post x lovely to hear from you all x

[Shining]

You deserve to move on and I hope you get all you wish for a very happy future. Why not write a blog Spanna, your journey to debt freedom will assist someone else I'm sure. x

[Niobe]

Spanna - what an awful story! We on the forum are right behind you anbd if you want to contact anyone off forum then all you have to do is go into your profile, access the dropdown menu to see which person you want to add as a Frugal Friend and as long as they do the same then you can speak off forum.

[Spanna1310]

I wouldnt know where to start to be honest - im still finding my feet around here lol x also keep noticing in posts that people put about "frugal friends" what does that mean? and how do you become friends offline here? sorry i may be being a bit thick here....

[Shining]

Spanna if you go into your profile and scroll down you'll see the option to add frugal friend and then you can converse off the forum assuming they do the same.

We also have frugal friends meet ups there was one last saturday.

[Niobe]

What you need to do is to into your profile. You will see on there a drop down menu which has all members on there. Click on the one you want and, as long as they click on the same thing for you then you can contact each other offline.

[Spanna1310]

Can I just ask if you add someone to your frugal friends will they get notified so they can add you if they want to? x

[Shining]

I'm not sure on that one but if you converse on the forum you can just mention you're going to add them and they can do the same. x

[Niobe]

No they don't get notified - they have to add you as well and then you can contact each other offline.

[Spanna1310]

Oh ok thankyou x

[Niobe]

I will go into my profile now and add you as a frugal friend. If you then do the same for me we can contact each other.

[Niobe]

I have added you and don't worry if it comes up and says that your details are invalid when you try and add - refresh the screen and your frugal friends will be there. Just click on contact and add a message and it will be received by the recipient.