living with my shame and stupidity

[na70]

yes a bit more upbeat but everything hinges on Tina/Melanie approving my income/expenditure.

didnt realise a basic sky package was allowed on IVA budget always thought it would be seen as a luxury item.

Neil

[kallis3]

You are allowed up to £21 I think, if you want anything else then you have to fund it by savings on your other allowances.

[fingerscrossed]

I still have a libary book outstanding form a few year ago and dare not go back as the fine is probably so large it should of been incorporated into my IVA!!! so rely on my friend who likes the same books as me and works at waterstones!!

glad your head is clearing.

[Skippy]

Sorry, I have to say something - a life centre?!?!?! How do they come up with these stupid names?!?!?

And now for my big confession - I borrowed a library book when I was 12 (I'm now 34!) and I didn't return it! I dread to think what the fine would be now!

[na70]

hi ladyh

thanks for your nice comments and sorry to hear about your son.

i know my daughter is with me everywhere and everyday and the good memories are what get me through the darkest of days.

things are out of my control now,i've supplied all the figures/info and have 90% of the required documents in an envelope ready to post should Melanie accept me.

the next few weeks will see me for the first time in my life tell credit card companys that i cannot afford to pay them i've no credit on them to bounce off each other and that will really drive home how big a hole ive gotten into.

no doubt the ensuing phone calls/letters wont be pretty but i intend to simply respond in a courteous fashion and tell the truth.

back to work tomorrow so that will be a welcome distraction.

will post more if/when i get any news from Melanie.

hopefully it wont be too long!

[MelanieGiles]

I am just waiting for those details from time and will be on to it straight away Neil.

[na70]

thanks Melanie,

dont mean to be putting pressure on you or Tina

i understand you are both busy.

perhaps i shouldnt post your names up here,dont want it to appear im giving a wrong impression because im really very happy with your service,help,support and advive.

[MelanieGiles]

There is no problem in coversing about either Tina or myself on the forum Neil - we are used to it!! I think Tina is sending me a batch of cases later on this evening, so your details will hopefully be amongst them.

[Mrs.T.]

Hi Neil, great post.

After twenty years of reckless spending and ever increasing debt eventually totalling over 200K we finally realised the end had arrived (and if i am completely honest some bad advice from banks/loan companys etc did not help the cause). We voluntary repossessed our home with the equity paying off any secured debts and IVA was commenced 15 months ago. As a couple we have never been happier. Yes there is no his and hers BMW's or fancy holidays etc but what we have now is more wholesome and we find we get enjoyment from doing the things in life that are free.

I dreaded Christmas because i have three children who wanted for nothing (thanks to debt) and a family who because we brought them nice presents expected it from us. Now after telling them the truth and it was not easy - family are pleased with a token gesture. We also told the children about our problems (aged 18, 16 and 11) it is amazing what a relief it is and how good and understanding they are. They are also learning to be responsible with money.

Best of luck it does get better.

[na70]

hi MRS T. thanks for your message.

i know things will improve im just being patient while Melanie and Tina discuss my statement of affairs(grim reading i can assure you.)

just in from work hoping maybe for an idea as to whether my nominating an iva was viable but no word back yet.

happy to say im working this weekend so that will keep my mind active and distracted.

reading other peoples stories and blogs and trawling through the forums is quite inspiring!!

[country girl]

It will be hard for the next few weeks but you will start to feel better and once things are sorted it will be a relief.
I to was glad to go to work to escape. It is hard having to stick to a budget but at the end of the day it has to be done I think all of us realise we could not carry on as we were.
It has been a great help to me finding this forum. At least you know you are not alone.
Good luck

[na70]

today is really the first time my debt situation will become public.

my first of three credit card payments this month is due today and i simply cant pay it or i will have no money left until the end of the month and i need to buy food and petrol.

really isnt a nice feeling at all,i will post of a letter today and prepare other ones for my other credit card companies.

i suppose the letters and phonecalls will start and to be honest i dont blame them at all.

need to help get my son some of his new school uniform so thats my priority.

just feel the pressure is really on now.....

[kallis3]

Hold your head up high Neil, and don't let the phone calls get to you. They're not nice and the call centres will try and bully you into making a payment, some will even say that if you don't, you won't get an IVA. This is utter rubbish as they have no say in the voting.

You could change your number (if you have online banking with any of the cards I would go in now and put a fictitious number in), you could refuse to answer the security questions as they can't continue with the call, or you could be polite and say you can't afford it, you're going for an IVA and then put the phone down.

Your family are your priority at the moment, and the forum is here when you want support.

[na70]

can my creditors contact my employer and tell them i've missed payments or ask for a portion of my salary to cover their payments?

[Julie]

No Neil, they can't and won't contact your employer. Remember they cannot discuss your personal business with any third party without your consent.

Waiting for the IVA to be proposed and passed is not easy, but we'll offer you support all the way.