Got the spondoolies and forms filled to the max.

[quark2008]

Somebody stop me or not. I've had two Cinzano Bianco's. What if I can hold my creditors off until I've been surgicalised, and have been deemed fit to reach Mach 2 again ? I have been posting for ages, so some of you can at least put a price on my dignity. What about me telling my creditors to shut up, for the time being. And wait ? What if I have my surgery, and recover, then can return to work and pay the whole lot off, within the year ??? What if my creditors said no, we are only interested in instant gratification ? Then that makes my creditors no better than me, in making mistakes, in getting caught right up. In the I want, what you fed me and can rape from you , right now. Your debts, if you make a payment right now, means I can pay MY bills.By way of commision. I make some money out of your misery, means I can stave off my own. What if I have my surgery, and die during it, or it's recovery. Life or debts. I want both and be able to save both. What a pickle. I should be sectioned.

[Shining]

Quark, your health is the most important thing firstly, your debts come after that for sure. Once bankrupt you'll be debt free. I can only say it how I see it, you know what to do for sure. x

[quark2008]

what I'm really pissed off about is not having the health to be at least nearly half way through my IVA, what I wouldn't do to be able to post and say I'm halfway through guys, can I share some tips ? Instead what i'm making sure is that I say my bedtime prayers, and that I b***** well wake up in the morning, so I can have my Weetabix again. I really do feel like I'm a dead man walking. I effing hate this sh**.

[Julie]

Quark -please stop beating yourself up, you have tried your best with the IVA and your health has to come first.

Remember, you need to be fit and around for many years to enjoy precious time with your daughter.

[quark2008]

I know what is happening to me. I know I may go to bed and not wake up. I know I am living on, not borrowed, but unsure time. I'm not a ****wit. I also know that the NHS may class me as collateral. 5 years ago, I could have got credit, flown to India, having known, what was wrong with my heart, whacked it on my credit card and be in debt yes, but fixed. Oh whatever, people will always make money out of other's misery, debt, health, IVA companies, whatever man, I couldn't give a bigger **** anymore.

[Skippy]

Quark, I'm going to shout at you now (I thought I'd better warn you first!) - YOU COULDN'T HAVE DONE ANY MORE TO REPAY YOUR CREDITORS AND YOUR HEALTH IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING HERE!

Julie is right, you've got to stop beating yourself up. You tried your best with your IVA and your health stopped you completing it, you did not choose to do so.

[quark2008]

I can't do bankruptcy on my own, I've got the funds and forms done. Yes. I can't do it, I just can't do it. I can't do it, I know it's an option. I declare myself bankrupt, I may as well jump in front of an intercity.

[kazzafunk]

quark2008 please please please, once you have done the BR you can move on. You are at the bottom by the sounds of it. The only way is back up.

No talk of ending it all please. I have almost been there myself and I can't bear to think of anyone like this

[quark2008]

I'm sorry folks. I haven't had a blow out for ages, yesterday was a horrible day by the end of it. I have to sit through the work capability assessment in an hour or so, and I've been up all night dreading it. I'm reaching the point where I cannot deal with anymore, though of course I won't do anything at all remotely stupid, just probably go home and cuddle up with my mum like a big baby. Anyhew...... Wishing you a good day.

[nepensioner]

So pleased you're feeling more positive today Quark, its summer, the sun is shining and life will get better over time....

[kazzafunk]

You rant away if it makes you feel better. We don't mind - I do it when I need to. Just no life ending thoughts now please. Good luck with the WCA