Do you sometimes feel guilty?

[essexmat]

I guess we all do but I do quite a fair bit.

On the one had I think it was sheer stupidity of my creditors to keep lending and lending to me when they could see all I was doing was paying one off against the other and making minimum payments but on the other hand I also feel that I should have been more responsible for racking up £38k of debt in 15 years with nothing to really show for it.

I know it sounds nice to say you have sort of got one over on these corporate sharks b ut at the end of the day no one forced us to keep taking and taking, especially for luxuries we could not afford. I readily admit I have funded many high cost holidays to the USA on credit , bought cars on credit cards etc - all when I knew I couldn't really afford to, but its way too easy shoving a piece of plastic in someones direction isn't it?

I do sometimes feel that an IVA (I am only in month 2 of 60) is the 'easy way out' but then I realise its not really, its a legal process and means you do suffer in away as you become insolvent and then after (hopefully) your IVA is complete you have to start to rebuild your credit. I do however like budgeting and knowing what I have bought is actually paid for and my only expenses are my monthly household bills and DD's and my IVA payment with no interest mounting up.

I have had conversations with people who don't agree with IVA's as they say "you borrowed it and cant pay it back and now get an easy way out" I simply reply "it's not an easy way out, I have to scrimp and save for everything I need/want and have to rebuild again after many years"

So, any thoughts anyone?

Also, while I am here, I found it very theraputic speaking about my story and would be happy to talk to anyone in the same boat or thinking of an IVA now I am in the 'system'

Hope you are all well - I am enjoying a long weekend with today and Monday off of work!

M

[kallis3]

Matt, I think we all feel guilty at some point because we can't pay our creditors back in full. However, we are doing our best so shouldn't worry about it.

I think it is good to speak to people in similar situations to ourselves, and to tell our stories.

I love budgeting now and making sure there is a small amount of money left in the bank at the end of the month - it makes such a change!

I have no intention of ever getting back into this situation again. If I can't afford it, I won't have it.

Have you thought of putting your story down in a blog M? It's helped a lot of us.

[essexmat]

Can you blog on here? If so I would like to know how to set it up - never done anything like that before

[Skippy]

I felt guilty at the beginning, but I've got past that stage now. Going BR wasn't my first choice, but I did what I had to do and worrying about it isn't going to do me any good!

You haven't taken the easy way out, I have great respect for anyone in an IVA as I know how hard they are x

[kallis3]

You can blog - it's been so long since I set mine up that I can't remember how to do it!

Click on the blog link and you should be able to sort it.

[essexmat]

Thanks all.

Right, I am off to Tesco's to do some shopping on my DEBIT CARD hee hee!

[Michael Peoples]

No one should feel guilty who enters an IVA as it is not an 'easy way out'. Bankruptcy is much more beneficial to debtors in the vast majority of cases but that too is not a way of dodging creditors but is a legal process to allow you to start again.

Whether it is bankruptcy, DMP or IVA there are sacrifices to be made and you have to put up with threatening phone calls, legal action and in some cases snide remarks from ignorant people.

Utimately, the decision as to which option to take should be yours alone based on the fullest information and advice from an insolvency practice. You and your family should always come before your creditors and you should choose your option accordingly. No one should be criticised for entering any form of insolvency whether formal or informal as the vast majority of people in debt just want to reach a fair arrangement with their creditors.

[Shining]

If I think too much I can feel guilty, but now I think I'm doing the best I can to repay my debts in a timely manner with as much as I can as it's a supervised amount and therefore it's justifiable.

[Mrs.T.]

not so much guilt but disapointed at ourselves, maybe we had an illness and iva is the cure, we certainly will never use credit in any form ever again

[Shining]

I feel I've let yongest daughter down, the others in their 20's and moved out but whilst they were growing up we had the 'nice' life and now we've got the 'frugal' life so she's missed out on a lot.

[kallis3]

My daughter has never missed out fortunately. Most things that she wants she funds herself.

I would have liked to have paid all of my debts off in full though. Unless I win the Euromillions tomorrow then it's never going to happen.

[Pennyless]

Does anyone think the major bankers that have not only took massive bonuses but have also caused mass employment and the loss of peoples livelihoods over the past 18 months feel guilty?

I'm sure due to their actions many more will be seeking IVA due to losing incomes....yes those seeking IVA's may have cars and houses and now found they cannot pay for them, however, some will be due to the reckless bankers so yes by all means feel guilty for the mess your in but also remember some are not alone in causing their downfall.

I do however feel a massive guilt for the reckless borrowing I have made and destroying my families future for the next 5 years (if i'm accepted).

[kallis3]

The way I look at is, I wanted the money, the banks agreed to loaning it to me.

I could have said no, but I didn't.

I consider myself totally responsible for my problems.

[Skippy]

I'm the same Jan. No-one forced me to borrow the money and no-one made me spend it.

[size5]

My own opinion is that whilst the recession seems to show signs of ending, this problem will run for years yet. People will run up debts now in a bid to survive if they have recently lost income or their jobs for example.

What I really dread is when the chickens come home to roost in the next uyear or two as interest rates rise, as they inevitably will. Millions of people in the last 2 or 3 years have taken the secured route/remortgage route to try and sort their debts out and there are going to be some nasty shocks when those bills start to rise. Repossessions, which were forecast to be bad this year, will escalate.

I hope I'm wrong, but I seriously doubt it.

Regards.