The best bit of news today> I am 70 - may parents lived to 94 and 97; my grandparents to 96 and grandmotherthree days off the 100. I will not be old until I am in my box. HSBC is one of mine too. Anymore good news?
J's mum must come first and you are right on focusing on making sure she has the best possible care at the hospital. I hope you have some good news from the hospital soon. Melanie is taking care of the finances so no worries there. You take care of all of the family and you have also helped me with the advice that you have also given on the forum, we are all here for each other.
IVA.co.uk The best place for debt advice. Thanks to Melanie Giles, David Mond, David and J (Elv5) Kallis, Dand, Skippy, Andy Davie
Thanks Paul - will want to pick your brains next week on housing issues - our SVP have identified some issues over the way a housing assoc is behaving with some of its residents - know nothing about it at prsent though except they are putting alot of pressure on single mums
David - my 87 year old Mum lives with us and we all get along fine. I moved her about six years ago, and although she acts like an 18 year old, it is nice to know that we are able to keep an eye on her as she gets a little older. I am sure that you will all get on well when the time is right too!
David,
Just going back to the cheeky little **** that said you were too old for an iva. The company concerned obviously didnt think so when they lent you the money so they are not very consistent are they.
IVA.co.uk The best place for debt advice. Thanks to Melanie Giles, David Mond, David and J (Elv5) Kallis, Dand, Skippy, Andy Davie
Paul, how right you are - HSBC my major creditor offered only a few weeks ago when they knew I was going for IVA £25000 to me £25000 to J when they know she does not work. How was she supposed to pay it? To help me overcome my difficulties they said!! I think Melanie would have shot me if I had taken up their offer. Did not like it when I refused and I did report it to Melanie when it arose. Anyway, the way things are going I am going to have two women to keep me in check at home, J and her Mum even though her mum takes my side (!!!) and, of course, Melanie from a distance!!
ivas4us wrote:
Hi J,
...remember there is a big race going on at the moment, it is called the Human Race and it is a pity that the call centre staff have not been entered.
Brilliant - i love it!
"It's better to be in control on a small budget than to be out of control on a large budget."
Remember, the only reason you feel down about this is because you are a good person. Bad people wouldn't feel guilty.
We grew up in an era when debt was seen as a sin. That is no longer the case.
The banks have thrown money at us over the last few years because they were greedy and made money from the extortionate charges. They didn't care whether we could afford to pay it back.
Every time we got near our limit, they increased it. That is not responsible lending so the banks must take at least 50% responsibility for the situation we find ourselves in.
Are they feeling guilty? I think not! Are they feeling guilty about what they have done to the world economy? No! Do they care about the lives they have ruined as a consequence? I doubt it!
So don't feel guilty and stop worrying. Take care of the important things in your life - your family & friends, as you obviously always do.
We are all thinking of you and hope J's mum is soon up and about again.
Last edited by angelc on Thu Apr 23, 2009 11:20 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"It's better to be in control on a small budget than to be out of control on a large budget."
Regards, David Mond, Insolvency Practitioner for over 46 years. Personal Insolvency Practitioner of the year 2012, Personal Insolvency Practitioner of the year finalist 2013 & 2014 awarded by Insolvency & Rescue Magazine and 2015 finalist for Personal Insolvency Firm of the Year.
Thanks ivas4us. I worried afterwards in case it looked like I was blase about it and I am definitely not that. We all know we have made mistakes and have felt ashamed and embarrased.
I have only told one person, who is also in a similar situation. I haven't told family or friends because of the shame but I am feeling less guilty when I see what the "professionals" have done.
I won't have them talking down to me because if they can't get it right, how can they expect us "ordinary" folk to. They said no-one could have predicted the crash but I did 6 years ago although I didn't realise how extensive it would be. Common sense told me that house prices couldn't continue to soar as they were. People couldn't continue to borrow without paying it back somewhere down the line. Eventually, everything finds it's own equilibrium.
We did what we beleived was the best thing to do at the time - with hindsight, we were wrong. So we have to admit to our mistakes and try to make amends, which is what we are all doing. I'm sure we have all learnt from our mistakes but we shouldn't be punished for them forever. We often judge ourselves more harshly than we judge others. We must learn to forgive ouselves.
"It's better to be in control on a small budget than to be out of control on a large budget."
