Bickering

[iamfubb2]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Andy Davie

Hi

With some regret I am going to retire TigerTiger from the forum, however I have invited him to return as a professional poster with his true identity disclosed to all.

I have to say that I found the points that he raised very interesting but have to look at the wider picture and the need to keep the forum friendly and approachable, it has become a little like "Question Time" as a poster pointed out a few days ago

Regards

Please put this person back on the forum, hopefully as Tiger Tiger. If not i hope whoever it is that they take up your offer, they would be sorely missed.

[Foggy]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Michael Peoples

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by Foggy

Yes, Michael, the written word often doesn't come across as the writer intended and is always better understood over a shared libation

Sorry Foggy but I am not sharing my libations with anyone! There are limits....

[:D][:p]

[terry d]

yes im wondering myself that imfubb2 is correct,after a lot of thinking about a dmp iva i really thought if i dont pay anthing to anybody ,what can they do,i have no assets they can take, my credit ratings rubbish,i think people get really scared about creditors letters etc,i just think,i aint got it so you cant have it,ive worked for the last 30 years of my life never claimed any dole money etc,but sometimes doing your best is just not good enough,im going bankrupt soon and its a huge relief to me,im learning to live within my means again,its hard but im kind off proud not to have a credit card now,why should i be made to feel bad about myself ,when im sure all the bankers dont about the billions we tax payers gave them,im holding my head up high now thinking yep im broke but nobody bailed me out

[Broke of London]

I don't want to sound like a girly swot, but I probably wouldn't join y'all in a 'debt boycott'. I want to repay my debts.; I'm not repaying them because the banks are forcing me to.

[terry d]

i think most would like to pay them,but i cant,if i won the lottery this week,i would ring all my creditors and pay them,but i just cant find the £38,000,its only to my ill health that keeps me from working properly,this time 4 years ago,i had a morgage on a £260,000 house,a £20,000 bmw in the garage,3 holidays a year,thats all gone now,and no crdeit cards or loans,but im looking forward now to a stress free life i hope

[Niobe]

We wouldn't either - we love our home to much to lose it and that's what would happen if we stopped paying everything.

We are both happy to be in an IVA and to know that we are paying some of our debt back.

[KAYKAY]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by iamfubb2

So carrying on the unhelpful posts here's one , why dont all the people in an IVA or DMP (and i mean everyone) just chuck it in say no we are not paying anything, do your worst

Perhaps this is because a lot of us took the debt on with the intention of paying back every penny (I know I did), I did not realise how deep I was getting in and always thought something will turn up and it didn't... this did not excuse me or relieve me of my responsibilities, and my personal pride and standards made me want to pay back as much as I possibly could. I was not proud, in fact I was ashamed that I had gotten myself into this mess and had to resort to an IVA. I blame no-one other than myself.

[Niobe]

Same here KAYKAY.

[Broke of London]

I didn't mean anything by my post Terry. I remember your arrival on the forum and know how you struggled to decide what to do for the best. And your health is so much more important than money!

Touch wood I am young, healthy and have a stable income so am in a very fortunate position and I don't take that for granted.

The forum has opened my eyes to life and I realise just how quickly and unexpectedly things can turn upside down!! I wouldn't ever judge anyone else's decisions or expect them to make the decision I make living a different life.

[terry d]

i do like the differnt views of life money etc you get on this forum,we all seem to have come here by a missfortune of money,everybody has their own points to make and its good to agree to dissagree,im already thinking one step ahead of my bankrupsy and re-training as counceller of some sort,looking forward is the way,you cant change yesterday but you can change tomorrow

[iamfubb2]

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by KAYKAY

font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica">quote:<hr height="1" noshade>Originally posted by iamfubb2

So carrying on the unhelpful posts here's one , why dont all the people in an IVA or DMP (and i mean everyone) just chuck it in say no we are not paying anything, do your worst

Perhaps this is because a lot of us took the debt on with the intention of paying back every penny (I know I did), I did not realise how deep I was getting in and always thought something will turn up and it didn't... this did not excuse me or relieve me of my responsibilities, and my personal pride and standards made me want to pay back as much as I possibly could. I was not proud, in fact I was ashamed that I had gotten myself into this mess and had to resort to an IVA. I blame no-one other than myself.

I took my debt on with every intention of paying it back also but as many people know circumstances change "the best laid plans of mice and men"and all that. Merely posted the idea to see what sort of responses it got, some interesting, some dismissive and others seem to have taken it as a personal jibe, it was not intended to be so. As for being ashamed, no way!! i still have my pride and, self respect doesn't cost a penny. Not sure the bankers and others in the financial sphere who contributed to the debt mountain could say the same with their "hit and run" attitude. And i dont think i'll be getting any mega-bonus for messing up.I'm not looking for a scapegoat and accept that i am responsible for managing my debt but, blaming myself is counter-productive to the process[8D]Regards iamfubb2

[KAYKAY]

iamfubb2 - I did not take it personal, just responded to the point in your post honestly. I accept that it was just a "what if" question, and am not judging you in any way shape or form. We are all individual hence the term Individual Voluntary Arrangements and all our circumstances are different.

[12 months to go]

I to entered into an IVA for several reasons, namely to get my finances back in order, to relieve the pressure i was under and to see a better return than Bankruptcy would give my creditors.

Like many posters on here, for 20+ years I had a perfect credit history, not one blemish, no missed payments and had high morals towards debt; the alarming thing for me having a good job and income,alongside a perfect credit history, was finding myself in a situation whereby my income opened all sorts of doors in terms of lenders falling over themselves to offer me credit, which foolishly I took.

Now in no way am I blaming the financial institutions for my position, I could have said no but didnt, so no one else to blame but myself. That said, im sure the tough economic times we are now amidst and the tightening up of lending criteria will result in far less people getting as far in debt than I was in the years ahead. I could have declared myself bankrupt almost 6 years ago and I would have been discharged years before now, so whilst lenders may not touch me for some years to come, as far as im concerned I took a more responsible path than Bankruptcy ( no disrespect to any fellow posters that have declared themselves Bankrupt, for many people this is a better or sometimes only option )

My lack of funds for the last nearly 6 years has changed my life completely; I consider that whilst also being another year older ( im now 46 ), ive probably become somewhat dull as I havnt had money to splash around going out ie meals, nights out, weekends abroad etc. Although that said much of this was done on plastic before my IVA, so it will be nice now ive made my last payment to try and get my life back and be able to afford to pay for the aforementioned social activities, without a credit card in sight.

I have found this forum really useful in more ways than i could mention; yes occasionally the odd post appears that can seem a little of hand, but then frustrations are vented on here, indeed I was very wound up a few weeks ago and smoke came off my fingers when posting. The replies from a few experienced fellow posters made me think better of my post & removed it. The next morning I had calmed down and I adopted a completely different tact which im pleased to say saw the issue i had with my IVA provider resolved.

Hope ive not strayed too much in terms of my reply to the original posting, but I for one would not like the stress of having stopeed making paymenst to see what happened.

[KAYKAY]

12 months to go... very good post and I am sure relates to a lot of posters on here.

[12 months to go]

thanks KAYKAY

I might use my spare cash to go on a typing course, as whilst my spelling is good, when I read back through my posts the typos jump out & hit me ... thats my excuse anyway