1yr in,,,,Spoke to IP

[tinytori]

Hi Guys

Im nearly 1 yr into my IVA (25th July), and I just feel so down about it all, I know its my own fault Im in debt and I know Im on the road to having no debt, I know all this. I just feel so hung down with it all at the moment. Please tell me other people have felt like this at some point during their IVA. I just worry about it all the time. Sorry for this post, I havent told any of my friends and this forum is the only place I can say how I feel xxx

I spoke to my IP today who was brilliant, i explained to him how I was feeling, and he totally understood, of course there isnt really anything he could do, but he just built me back up reasurring me that I had done so well in my 1st etc, he also told me not to worry about my daughters school dinner money as he would change my expenditure when the time came. I feel so much better for talking to him!!!!

[aguise]

Hi tiny.
Why so down and worrying honey. I think things are getting tight for a lot of us lately. You are with fj like me arent you. I have found them to be great with any probs if you are having any have a word with your ac manager. I have to say though i am waiting for my eighteen month review and havent heard anything. Though I will chase it up when hubby gets paid.I certainly have downers about it at times and then think about how it was before and at least now know that it is heading towards a
conclusion. Like yo we don have anyone to talk to about it all as we chose not to tell anyone. Do you have one close friend you trust and could confide in it may help to have someone to talk to, but either way we are always here.

Ang xx

[tinytori]

Ang, I cant really pin point why I feel like this, I guess it might be the face my daughter and Hubby has there birthday's coming up and my DD wants a party like all her other friends and she wants a bike and more more more lol!!! I guess Im just being sill really. Iam with FJ and I think I get on very well with my IP I will talk to him on Monday I think. I feel really embrassed to tell any of my friends, who have their nice houses and can go on hols etc!! God Im rambling now sorry xx

[aguise]

I understand tiny about the friends and totally about your daughter.Have a sleepover with a few of her friends , much less expensive than a party and they all love it. Though you will be pulling your hair out. My daughter had one for the grandaughter and it was bedlam when I went the next morning but they had all loved it filled up on pizza. Balloons all over the place but didnt cost that much. I would speak to fj and see if there is anything that you can do to maybe get the bike. Maybe a shorter payment for this month and catch up over the next few. Dont worry about asking they can only say no.
Not being silly at all. I feel so much for those with children it is so hard for them to understand that you just cant manage it. Luckily mine have all grown though they still cost me. Read my blog about the one getting stuck in Ibiza. Every penny of our contingency went there. You never escape.lol
Ang xx

[Jan01]

I think we all feel like that at some time. It is hard at birthday and Christmas times it is my grand daughters 18th Birthday soon and I am already trying to work out how I can get a her a present fitting the occasion. Being in an IVA is hard (I am over 3 years in mine) and I get fed up listening to other people say about their holidays and the clothes they have brought and the evenings out.
Try to keep cheerful I know its hard there is a ending to this honest and life will become more normal. Remember this site is great for support just keep posting its nice to know there are others in the same situation--well you know what i mean.

Take care

Jan

[kallis3]

Jan, I know how you feel. Last Christmas most people got vouchers which I had earned through doing surveys. Even daughters digital camera from the same source. This Christmas will be the same. Hubbie and I just exchange token gifts. There isn't much we want anyway so it's a good job.

Daughter is 21 next year and will, hopefully, be gaining her degree, so lord knows how we are going to cope with that!

I'll not think about it now because it just depresses me!

[Kazzy E]

Hi Tiny, I know it doesn't really help the moment, but just think of all the spare money you'll have in your pocket when your IVA comes to an end. The next four years will fly by - just think how quickly the last four went looking back. I am sure I will have the IVA blues when mine is accepted, but it is only for a relatively short time and will soon be over. Think positive hun, Kazzy x

[jpj]

I feel just the same this week Tinytori !... You go to work, come home,and at the end of the week you pay your bills,get some food and the whole lot has gone!! its like been on a flippin hampster wheel!...then you pick up the paper and see celebs and wealthy people going to Nelson Mandelas private birthday party on thursday and paying £100,000 just for a ticket and not batting an eyelid! (i know its prob for charity but..)
well im off to Tescos for food...and a LOTTERY TICKET!!

[plasticdaft]

I think living on credit in the past was the only reason I was happier than I am now. But gradually over time I am sure I will begin to appreciate how much better off I am(not just moneywise),by only spending what I can afford. The thought of doing nothing about our debts filled me with such fear that I always think back to how I felt if I am ever down.
I also like to take pleasure(albeit tiny amounts),in finding bargains,or saving money.ie got house insurance quote from our current company of £329,but managed to get same cover with AA for £169,saved £46 on wifes car insurance by shopping around too.

Hope you start to feel happier soon,its never easy,and like most people this forum may be the only place you can let it out!!

[caraf]

If you manage to save money like this on your car insurance, for example, who gets the savings !! and what happens at review time does the savings mean your IVA payment goes up !!

[kallis3]

I suppose it would, after all your expenditure for that will have gone down, so unless you can 'lose' the extra money with some other expenditure I would imagine that you would be expected to pay it over.

[michael.t47]

i have close friend at work who has just finished his iva, have bent his ear lately and told him i am applying for one. he told me the 1st couple of years were the hardest. but he has said it was the best thing he ever did. i know he will be there for me in my darkest hours, as will everybody on here

[plasticdaft]

I am sure with the cost of fuel and groceries etc going up that I will be able to lose my extra money quite easily. Our childcare costs will be going up after the summer holidays too so where we save somewhere we nearly always use the extra. Just make sure you know what all your allowances are,our IP made sure we knew what we would be allowed to claim,we didnt think of things like dry cleaning,professional body fees etc,haircuts even.

[kallis3]

It's great that you have someone to talk to Michael. I wouldn't dare tell anyone at work, they're very judgemental about things like this.

At least I have the forum. It's great to come on and have a moan, share good news etc with friends.

[michael.t47]

i used to support him during his money troubles, never dreamed i would be in his situaion one day. we are very good friends