www.iva.co.uk

i have always hidden my debts from my mum&dad,basically because i was embarrassed&always thought that if i had to go bankrupt it would show them up.but today i decided to be brave&tell them about my debts&the iva.i was absolutely sobbing,but they both just gave me a great big cuddle &said "why on earth didnt you tell us,we would've helped you&supported you"they then said that nothing would ever make them ashamed of me,&especially not a debt problem.they said that they would always love me no matter what.

Well done Tori, I haven't told my parents as they are both unwell and I know they would worry. It must fell great to have shared the problem and get the support you need. Most parents are wonderful in accepting their children and loving them regardless.

Jan

Ah Tori, what a relief that must be for you. You're parents sound fab. You're very lucky. It'll make things so much easier for you now to have them supporting you. My Dad knows everything because unfortunately he's a creditor![:(] X

Well done Tori. I daren't tell my parents as they are elderly and have never been in a position like this. I think they would kill me!!!!!

Don't like keeping it from them, but I think it's for the best.

they then said "why dont you just declare yourself bankrupt then it will be all over&done with,we will help&support you every step of the way&then you can make a fresh start" i told them that i couldnt handle having my name put in the paper as it would show us all up.they said they couldnt care less if my name was in the paper just so long as i was happy&not living in a nightmare.my mum even said 'they can use my name for the newspaper if they want! 'they were fantastic& i feel a trillion times better.xx

that was supposed to say 'happy and not living in a nightmare' i cant type properly im all of a dither.thank u all for your replies i do feel much better.but have assured them that im happy with the iva.ive felt guilty for years for not confiding in them and i wish i had have told them.but i wont dwell on the past.im just glad its all out in the open.xx

That's lovely to hear that your parents are being so supportive It helps to tell them, but sometimes it's easier said than done!

Well done, I've not told anyone, can't tell my Mum as she wouldn't understand what an IVA is bless her. Sometimes I get so close to confiding in someone and then withdraw at last moment. Maybe one day. x

well,its taken me nearly ten years to tell them,and i knew deep down that they would be nothing but supportive,and understanding as they nearly went bankrupt themselves in the 1990's due to their business not making any profit.it is not easy to admit to your parents that your in a mess,but like they said i have nothing to be ashamed about & they are so proud of me for doing this all by myself & having the courage to recognise that i had a problem & do something about it.x [:)]

thank you all for your kind words.up until now nobody knew about my iva apart from my other half & my virtual & very supportive friends on here.when i told them they both said 'whats an iva ?! ' and there was me panicking that they might find out via the insolvency register.they had no idea,ive had to explain everything to them.xx

Tori, your parents sound wonderful. Wish mine were like that.

Tori well done you for making a brave decision to tell your parents. I havent told my parents because my wife and I talk to each other about our debts and of course as you mentioned your virtual friends(though we are all real,honst!!).
If you are single an IVA/BR can be a very lonely time with noone to bounce your feelings off.

Give you Mum and Dad a hug from me for being so understanding,silly as it sounds to expect them to be anything other than,I mean its not like you have robbed a jewellers or stolen a sports car,you have merely fallen into the very easy trap to get into that is debt.

Plastic, as far as my parents are concerned, the amount of debt I am in would be the same as being a criminal! They would disown me!

thanx guys.i feel very relieved but also a bit strange.i didnt sleep a wink last night so im shattered.going for an iva and then telling my parents are the 2 hardest decisions i have ever made in my life,but also the best ones.x...ps viki,i hope you are feeling okay today.x [:)]

kallis,the amount of my debts is the one thing that i couldnt tell them about as it makes me feel sick everytime i think about it,but they said that its not important to them anyway & im crying again now,my dad has just come back from the shop with some flowers for me (& a potato pie !) i will pull myself together now and stop nattering you all to death.i just had to get it off my chest.thank you all for your support.x [:)]