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Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 11:28 am
by neil277
Hi
I have been in a IVA for 1 year 8 months never missed a payment my problem is my drinking has got out of hand and now i'm taking kalm tablets everyday because there is no end to the debt.
Today i'm stopping to drink and hope my hands stop to shake but for the future i know i have to go BR, my wife and i are off to her country because my wife has not seen her family for 4 years and my wife's mum wants to see the baby (my mum is paying) Once our baby lands in her country the Government will take over control and make us register the baby as Belarusian so duel passport, one good thing we will not have to pay for the passport its free. My wife loves her President and she calls him Father.
The Country has clean streets no litter but is a Police state two policemen on every corner, very safe country.
In Practice we cannot live under this debt my wife has English Diplomer and is stuudying CIMA. I had Cancer when i was 21 years old and still have treament blood tests for life and scans this is why i have to be relaxed and get rid of the debt for my health and my family.
My life has to change from today by stopping my SO to cleardebt, i have to give up being school Governor and politics but family and health come first.
I will keep people informed with what happens.
Regards.
Neil
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 11:34 am
by kallis3
Neil, how awful all this stress has been for you.
If you are managing to pay your IVA payments, then you are a good way in, and it would be a shame to stop now. There is an end to the debt - as soon as you make that last payment!
Please try and stop drinking - it's not good for you, doesn't solve your problems and eats into your money. I am sure your wife is worried about you as well.
Perhaps this trip to her homeland will be good for you. A break from the stresses of this country.
Don't make any rash decisions until you come back.
Perhaps you need to speak to your IP and ask them if you can take a break, or even lower the payments?
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 12:08 pm
by emma_t
Hi Neil
Maybe a fresh start under bankruptcy would be the clean start you need for you and your family.
It seems the stress is too much for you to cope with and as a result you have started drinking. Please stop this as soon as you can and if you have a serious problem get help now, my 40 year old cousin has been given 2 months to live as he is a severe alcoholic and all his organs are failing and he has end stage pancreatitis. It is heartbreaking for all the family to watch him as he is a lovely person and has 3 children under 6 and a lovely wife. Don't mean to go on about my own situation or try to worry you but it can turn out to be very serious.
Have a visit to your GP to get some help.
Wait for a professional to advise but it does seem you need a fresh start in life and to be happy with your family.
Love and best wishes
Emma xx
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 1:32 pm
by Soulgrowth
Neil ... just wanted to send you my good wishes, and to let you know that my thoughts are with you ... there WILL be a solution to your problem ... you and your wife and baby are much more imprtant than money.
So take care ... keep in touch with the Forum and be sure to let us know how you are getting on.
Debbie
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:08 pm
by neil277
Hi
Thanks for your support but for my situation and people like me the first solution is my health and family, if i carry on in the IVA i would end up in hospital because stress can cause a number of problems. The law is very complex with BR but it does have its good points. If i was to stay the course in my IVA who can say 1 year on i would not be in the same position as i am now.
Food, gas, electricity, petrol, council tax etc, etc and we all have to be honest Great Britain is spiraling out of control, once BR i will take a month off to be with my family at home then i will look for job.
I have just been appointed School Governor and pas there 99 test including a police check my next step was councillor. i spent 2 years with one of the 3 main parties on the board of committee i was pused out because i blocked certain things that affected the normal people who worked for a living and was replaced by someone who does not care about his community, i understand one thing 90% of councillors and Politicians dont care.
There is no difference between an IVA and BR for me because i dont own anyting and for credit rating there is always Non Status and by this time my wife will be able to go to work.
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 3:15 pm
by Viki.W
Hey Neil, I can't offer you any advice, it sounds as though you have made your mind up. Your wife and baby and your health is more important than money, I really do hope you can resolve this soon. I'm also glad that you are taking steps to stop the drinking as this type of drinking can ruin lives and it sounds as though you love your family very much. Good luck, we're all here for you. Viki X
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 4:27 pm
by Soulgrowth
Hi Neil ... the right solution is the solution that is right for you.
Good luck [:)]
Debbie
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 5:06 pm
by freelili
you have to do what is right for you. Its not a question of carrying on with the IVA, ruining your health and that of your family. There are more important things in life than money. Existance is fine if its tollerable.
Do what you have to do...get out of this damaging black hole and start to live.
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 6:21 pm
by Skippy
Neil, you have to do what is right for you and your family. Your health and happiness come first, not your creditors. You have tried an IVA and it wasn't the right solution for you - there's no shame in that, at least you tried.
I think the trip to your wife's homeland will do you good, and from what you've said it sounds much better than this country!
Good luck for the future to you and your wife and baby xxx
Posted: Sun Jun 08, 2008 6:25 pm
by neil277
Hi
I quiet agree you have to do what is right for you today we went shopping £67.00 and some items were buy one get one free we never went over the top. Eveyone makes up there own mind in which way they want to go but i feel that all IVA'S will have to change there practice.
Thanks.
Neil