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Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 5:31 pm
by buttercup
Hi Everyone

Well it is nearly a year ago today that all hell broke loose & I confessed to my hubby what I had done. For anyone new here I lost a very very large amount in a business trading the stock market. This time a year ago I was betting that the markets would crash over the next 12 months, in hindsight I was right but just could not hang on long enough to make up the losses. Typical as I stopped trading the crashing started to happen. Well that’s life!
I was in a very dark place a year ago and I hope I never go there again. My life felt like a nightmare. I still think about it all but life moves forwards not backwards

But 12 months one I am a bit of a success story, Firstly my life is so much better, I am a lot happier, less angry, more content but still have enough fire in my belly to push ahead. I will not pretend that the last year has all been plain sailing, it took me a few months before I actually realised I could not get out of this huge hole I was in I contacted Tina at Melanie office on the 4th Feb and cried on her shoulder for a while . Tina if you read this you truly helped me turn around. On 25th I went up to Melanies office for a face to face meeting & on 10th April my IVA was approved with a Full & Final settlement.

I have been training as a web designer and just invoiced out my first job what a great feeling that was. Hubby & I are even closer than ever, things are still tight, especially to make the mortgage payment! Rate cut will help. I do not ever spend on what I do not need anymore and whats more I never through any food away.

Boy can I budget! Things are still hard but better than living with huge debt

All 3 kids are doing well at university I have saved weekly so I have all my Christmas food, drink & present money. Not going silly (so no debt for January) Really looking forward to them all being home. A bit different from last year.

So for everyone out there a few pointers that helped me.

1. Get a good IVA practitioner I highly recommend Melanie but I know there are other good ones on the IVA board as well.

2. Change your telephone number do not feel that you deserve to be shouted at all time. What we have all done is bad enough to live with do not put yourself through it anymore.

3. Stay positive , IVAs are not easy, debt is an enemy just posing as your friendly credit card. Hang in there things will get better but it all takes time. Patience springs to mind

4. Get a pre paid credit card – a life saver

Well if I do not pop in again I would like to wish you all a Merry Christmas & Happy 2009

Lastly a thank you to Andy & his team who run the IVA forum, and all who post here if it was not for all of you I would not have got through this year.

Many thanks


Kathy xx

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 7:50 pm
by Lisa2009
What a lovely positive post and one that im sure will be an inspiration to anybody just starting their journey. Thanks so much and im really glad things are good for you xxxxx

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 8:39 pm
by Viki.W
Thats a great post Kathy, have a great Christmas and New Year. X

Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 8:42 pm
by Julie
What a lovely, honest post...please try and stick around Kathy [:)]

xx

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 8:40 am
by buttercup
Thank you for your kind words.
After I had posted it I thought I hope no-one thinks I am gloating or patronising as it was not meant to be like that. It is just I wanted others starting out there to realise that they too can get through this awful nightmare. It is a struggle and will be for a long time but better dealing with it than sticking my head in the sand.

P. S oven blew up last night so not out of the woods quite yet. LOL but I will count that as a 2 steps forward & 1 back problem.

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 9:19 am
by Wizzzard
A great post Buttercup, and one which tels us there is a life after IVA. I think my IVA is the best training I could possibly have on how to succeed in life without a flexible friend. Your points ae well made and well put ... thank you.

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 9:37 am
by Shining
Fantastic post. I'm 12 payments in at the end of this month and through all my trials throughout the IVA which happened in the first 3 months, I can honestly say I've never been happier for many years. x

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 9:59 am
by buttercup
Yes I agree I am a lot happier now. I can remember the day after I had stopped trading (I was sat with PC for 12-14 hours a day) actually noticing how blue the sky was the next day and a little Robin sat on my windowsill. It was then I realised that I had not appreciated anything for ages as I was so consumed with debt and trying to make up loses I did not notice anything else around me. I really do notice things now

I have lost my aggression but kept my drive.

Well done Lesly on getting through your first 12 months sucessfully
Kathy xx

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 12:10 pm
by tori
That really is a lovely post Kathy..am so pleased that things have finally come together for you and that you are much happier now.It is so nice to read posts like this...take care,and i hope things continue to go well for you[:)]xx

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 8:07 pm
by Skippy
That's a lovely post Kathy, and certainly doesn't come across as gloating or patronising.

I'm so glad things are working out for you, and I hope you do post again before Christmas, but if not have a lovely Christmas and New Year xxx

Posted: Sat Dec 06, 2008 9:26 pm
by kallis3
What a lovely post Kathy, so pleased you have managed to come out the other side. I can equate with the storm caused with confessing to hubby, I had the same problem.

I hope everything continues to be good for you.

Keep posting.

Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 10:32 am
by buttercup
Thanks

I must admit the first few months went slow & painful but the last 6 months have flown. Not long now for you LH.
Kallis hope you confession has not put too much strain on things. It is awful I know.
Skippy great to hear from you you helped me lots by the way.
Does Debbie post anymore?

Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 10:37 am
by kallis3
Hi Buttercup,

No, Debbie doesn't post anymore, she is busy with her offline things.

Hubby and I weathered the storm (it's not good when it all comes out on your birthday - a week before Christmas!), and no longer keep financial troubles from each other. We're doing great, thanks.

Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 12:59 pm
by MelanieGiles
What a cheerful post for a frosty Sunday morning - and great to see that you are experiencing life the other side of the tunnel Kathy.

We were very happy to act for you, and I remember how stressed you were when you first came to the office. A true success story which will inspire a lot of others who are active on, or simply just watch the forum.

Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 4:38 pm
by freelili
Well done Buttercup, I am really pleased you have turned your life around. You deserve a very happy christmas.

Best wishes