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Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 10:38 am
by Rosepetal
Hi, i'm really struggling & i feel wrecked. didn't sleep very well again,feeling rough and very tearful.

had a email this morning for more paperwork which is so frustrating after sitting up so late to get the last lot done. this is killing me/us.

i still keep wondering if BR would be better for me. i'm so terribly exhausted,so worn out physically and emotionally, i can't even get goinng to get dressed. i just feel lkie walking away from everything. i'm dreading our children being home for Christmas,having to pretend we're fine when we're so not.
i know i sound negative,i'm so tired,i've really had enough.

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 10:46 am
by Shining
Rosepetal, I do know it's not easy and I'm guessing at this time of year it makes it that bit harder. Try and step back and have an IVA free day and hopefully tomorrow things won't seem 'as bad', all the information that is required is vital to an accepted IVA. I sincerely hope you're feeling less stressed very soon. xx

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 11:08 am
by kallis3
I agree with Lesley, try to relax and just sort things out in your mind. Concentrate on your family being around you for Christmas.

Do you feel that you could share these problems with them? Might make you feel better than trying to put a brave face on things.

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 2:19 pm
by greeneyes34
Try to think positive. You are taking a major step towards sorting out your debts and while it can seem like a never ending list of paperwork that you have to get together just focus on how much better things will be once this bit is over. Lesley is right - take a day off from it all and if you have any snow where you are (we have about a foot where I am) get dressed up nice and warm and go for a nice long walk - you will definately sleep tonight then! :)

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 2:52 pm
by back on track
this is definatley the worst part of the process getting al the bits together.
when this is all done you will just have the wait till your meeting which can be just a nerve racking but i can tell you from having done all this (and it was near christmas as well)you will have a new lease of life and all the problems you once had will seem a distant memory.
trust us when we say it will be fine.
forget about it once all your paperwork sent and try and let yourself have christmas off at least.

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 7:06 pm
by corfu
hi rosepetal
good advice from the regs on here
i know what you mean about the paperwork but it will come to a end for both of you.i thought about br but i wanted to pay back what i could as i was the one that borrowed the money.i think the paper work for br is the same if not more forms to fill in etc.

with the phone calls the kids 15/19 and 21 were always first to answer so we all sat down and talked about what was going on with dad keep getting calls from mnba they now understand what is going on

so we are looking foward to a credit free christmas.and dont forget we all struggle at the start
corfu

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 7:45 pm
by orange
if im honest it tough all the way but worth it.its is also stressful but you will feel better when all sorted

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 9:45 pm
by lem
Hi Rose, I hope you are ok, we are really stressed aswell and worried that there just doesn't appear to be enough disposable income to do this, hang in there, we can get through this I am sure xx

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 9:48 pm
by kallis3
You will get through it - just be strong.

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 10:11 pm
by corfu
kallis 3
you are one of the stars on here [:)][:)]

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 10:20 pm
by kallis3
Thank you corfu.

Posted: Fri Dec 17, 2010 11:08 pm
by baldy
HEY rosepetal, keep your chin up, trust me it does get better. We found it abit tuff at times. We just had to have a non IVA day! now and then.I would give my self a time limit of 2hrs in the weekend to sort out as much as we could and then leave it to the next day.

We hated trying to get all the paper work together but once you get it all sorted and then get your creditors meeting organised things will start to get alot better for you.

We have not been in ours that long but one of the things we found was a big help was telling one of our closest friends about what we were going through.

Im sure you will get sorted soon, best of luck and keep posting if it helps.
Baldy and family[:)]

Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 2:58 pm
by mrsbee
Hi Rosepetal didn't want to read and run - I know what you mean about the stress with paperwork we went through the whole prcoess up to the point of drafting the proposal with CCCSVA and then they decided to tell us we had to give our car back to the HP company leaving us with no car and no means of transport?! Anyway to cut a VERY long and stressful story short we found this forum and Melanie Giles team and we have never looked back our IVA was accpted last week and I can't tell you what a relief it has been. Stick with it!
We also have children and our eldest is 9 - he knows something is going on because I have been such a cow lately hopefully now we can see the light at the end of the tunnel things will pick up a bit.
Try to send all the paperwork off before Christmas and then forget about it for a day or two. Good luck, and have a good Christmas :)

Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 5:04 pm
by Rosepetal
thankyou for the support. i'm a bit better today but didn't sleep again.my hubby keeps telling me he's sorry for the mess,i know he means it which means a lot.
snow is slowing some paperwork down,we've had to request some of the things we've been asked for.
Christmas will enforce a pause,just hope creditors don't keep ringing,i don't want my son at uni to be worrying,we want him to pass his exams he's worked so hard.i'm ashamed&don't want him to know. i feel bad that we can't give him any more cash,he hasn't got a job at the moment,he's managed to get some work experience(un paid but he's hopeful it'll help him get a job in the summer).
my husband has said he doesn't want to go BR he wants to pay what we can back.

it is stressful,you guy's help,thankyou

Posted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 5:27 pm
by Foggy
Hi Rosepetal. Yes,it is stressful -- but worth it in the end. My IVA was agreed yesterday and the relief is indescribable :-).

I agree the paperwork is initially quite daunting, but it will soon be out of the way. What got to me was actually seeing my "mess" all assembled in one place ! For a start the actual debt was a lot higher than I had been telling myself ( which was a bit of a shock!).

The best thing, I found, was being able to vent and ask questions on this forum and others like it. We have all been there and the support is invaluable.

Chin up -- there IS a light at the end of the tunnel :-)