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Hi all having yet another bad day me head feels like its going to drop off im that stressed .Ive been thinking about the effect being in an iva will have on our children how to people manage to cope when it comes to school uniforms christmas and birthdays do you get any kind of allowence for these things i know in the grand scheme of things people may feel its unimportant but my children are my life and i want this to have as little effect on them as possible how do you all manage ?

Hi there, it's hard isn't it and I do know how you feel about your children being your life, my daughter is lucky enough to go to a select school and although we managed to keep up with the uniform, we were unable to send her skiing or off to Gambia and the likes, we've just turned down another foreign trip as unfortunately, the basics I can manage but not the luxuries. I feel awful for her and she's 17 now so I have explained our situation with little ones it's not so easy.

You will get a clothing allowance but birthdays and Christmas is normally taken from other allowances we can make a saving on. Therefore, if you are able to have a lean week with your shopping money then you are able to use that money for whatever you please.

I do feel it's important - very important. x

Hi Dodge

It is hard with children - our little girl is only small so doesn't really understand money and thankfully she will only be around 8 when we finish so still young enough to hopefully avoid a big impact. For Birthdays and Christmas I try to save elsewhere to put the money aside - I pay towards Park catalogue for Xmas and that really helps a lot to soften the blow.

Nearly 3 years in now and have to say whilst it makes you think more and obviously you can't rely on the credit card - it does make you consider birthday and xmas gifts more carefully - planning ahead more - and you find ways to ensure they don't miss out. I claim for school uniform as part of my daughters child care costs - previously it was nursery fees being claimed for - now its school dinners and uniforms along with her hobbies too.

I don't think any IP would expect a child to go without the essentials and the obvious costs associated with school - and if you plan carefully you can get them the treats they often deserve too.

Good luck xx

Hi dodge - this is a link to your other post which has quite a few replies on as this in relation to this one being the same:

http://iva.co.uk/forum/topic.asp?whichp ... 343#362483